Tales Of A Horny Single Mother

MOTHERHOOD . SEX . SELF LOVE . INDEPENDENCE

And that’s the way the cookie crumbles.

I have sex every 2-6 weeks, it depends on my schedule. I only have sex with one man during these times and I’m very selective when it comes to me finding a new companion, but lately I’ve been thinking about it and I don’t know why. Like yes, I don’t want to be portrayed as a whore, because women my age who are single and have multiple partners usually get branded with that name.

Am I emotionally stable enough to be with a new man? Am I physically ready to be with a new man? Do I want to have a threesome? I’ve had offers I can’t lie, But I’m terrified to be honest. I also am wondering if it’s time I start experimenting with females, not entirely sure about it but I’m keeping it as an option.

If we’re being honest I am so sexually satisfied with the companion I have right now that I don’t feel the need to be with someone else, I feel romanced and wanted by him. The way his fingers feel under the tips of my own, and the way I’m man handled in the bedroom is just so erotic. I get massages, kisses, spankings etc. and in the end I’m always cuddled. It’s probably top 3 in all of my sexcapades. But at the end of the day am I emotionally fulfilled?

I feel like there should be more to my life than sex, shouldn’t I want to be with someone more then just physically? I do like my companion trust me I do, if given the option I might even consider doing the relationship thing. But this is what I mean, shouldn’t a relationship be something that I want? Not something that I feel like I should have? I’m old enough for a relationship, I mean I have an almost three year old child.. Shouldn’t I be looking for someone I might want to marry soon? Start a family with? Have as a father figure in the seeds life?

Are my lack of needs really selfish wants when it comes to the seed? I don’t want to be forced to share her, I don’t know how well I’d do if I had to. Plus, the seed get’s so attached to EVERYONE I feel like her heartbreak would be worse than my own. Is that what I’m truly afraid of? Or am I just making up excuses for my own heart? I’ve seen so many girls, boys, men, and women who have been TORN apart by a mere breakup. I’m only as strong as my exterior allows me to be, I bruise so easily that I think the smallest of heartbreaks would ruin the experience for me.

Is it just me? Am I overthinking as usual?

Hey guys, it’s been awhile..

I’m so sorry it’s been a month since we last spoke tumblr, I just didn’t know how to tell you I met someone.

Now when I say met someone I really mean I’ve become introduced to a new me, and I’m not talking about the 15-20 pounds i packed on this last month and a half, thankfully I’m tall so you can’t even notice. I’m more in touch with myself now, I started cooking guys, LIKE REAL COOKING, and it’s good. I’ve stopped blaming my insecurities for the reasons I don’t date, and I’ve actually opened myself up to the idea of me ever having a real boyfriend.

It’s true guys, we’re about to get a whole lot more interesting.

Anonymous asked: i am one of your newest followers on twitter, you down to fuck? i dont mind any "indents" or "stretch marks'' i know everyone need some lovin, especially a single mother like yourself :) <3

Probably not but what’s your twitter?

Anonymous asked: Who is a celebrity you look up to?

I don’t look up to any celebrities, except for maybe Elizabeth Taylor.. But she’s dead.

Anonymous asked: Do you ever feel insecure about yourself with the guy you currently feelin

All the time, I’m probably one of the most insecure people on this planet.

One hitter quitter.

One hitter quitter.

Sex can be extremely awkward..

Especially as a young breast feeding mother. When I was ready to get back on that horse and start looking at eligible bachelors to date I had these massive tits that were leaking breast milk, ugh. It’s not even the milk itself that’s gross it’s the fact that you can’t do shit without lactating all over every thing, I would go to bed and wake up the next morning with my shirt soaking wet and my breasts hard as rocks. When you don’t milk yourself (pump, squeeze, feed your child, etc.) it is EXCRUCIATING pain to live when your breasts are full as fuck.

When I started dating, the seed would stay with my other mother and sister, now as a young single mom finally out on the scene, finding a man that I like, I decide that TONIGHT WILL BE THE NIGHT my vagina see’s something other than a tampon in like 9 months, with that being said that means the seed is going on an overnight visit (WOOHOOO CHILD FREEEEEEE). Oh how the angels were singing in my ear at that moment, until I’m laying in my (then) companion’s bed CRYING in pain. MY BREASTS WERE GOING TO EXPLODE THEY WERE GOING TO FUCKING EXPLOOOOOOOODE. Sweet Jesus even thinking about it makes my nipples tingle in agony. Anyway, so after milking myself for an hour to only have maybe a tenth of a cup come out because milking yourself by hand is not easy when you’re so swollen the slightest touch makes you want to chop your breasts off, I decide that I am going to have sex with this man, oh boy oh boy oh boy. 

His big arms are around me, I’m basically suffocating myself in his incredible muscles because I’ve never been with a man who turned me on so much that this is obviously a dream. I mean, mothers like myself who are covered in stretch marks DO NOT get sexy men like the one holding me and nibbling on my ear at that moment, his fingers running up and down my leg like I was some type of sculpture he was never allowed to touch until that very moment, his lips touching the inside of my thighs like my ‘you know what’ was a surprise worth waiting for. As he took my shorts off and kissed my stomach I started to shake uncontrollably, he proceeded to run his fingers up and down my side which made me feel super weird because my stretch marks were deep as fuck and I knew he could feel every indent, as my shirt came off I grabbed his shoulders and pulled him closer to me so he would kiss my neck and my breasts, there it went, my bra snapped off and do you know what fucking happened? I LACTATED IN HIS FUCKING EYEBALL, oh God, oh God, oh God, that’s all I could think, BODY WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH? DO YOU NEVER WANT A MAN TO WANT US? I KNOW YOU’RE ANGRY AT ME FOR MAKING YOU LOOK LIKE A TIGER BUT SOMEONE WAS WILLING TO LOVE US FLAWS AND ALL AND YOU DO ME LIKE THAT? I scream inside, let me tell you the look on this beautiful man’s face was the look of somebody completely mortified. It took him a solid week and a half for him to get over that, and we didn’t take my bra off during sex until I had stopped breast feeding for 3 months.

Sigh, sex can be so mother fucking awkward. -_-

Rambles.

Today I baked cupcakes with my daughter and it was the bomb.com, I felt extremely domestic for about an hour and a half while I made these ridiculously delicious cupcakes, I thought to myself, is this what my life is SUPPOSED to be like? Am I supposed to be in the kitchen baking for my children? My husband? My family? Anybody who knows me knows that I do NOT cook, I couldn’t cook a meal to save my life.. Is that why I’m single? Is that why I don’t feel like I need to be in a relationship? Is it the fact that I am so insecure about how shitty of a wife I’d be?

Is it weird that as I sit here thinking to myself “Wow, maybe I need to settle the fuck down and get my shit together” I continue to hate the existence of every single man who has allowed me to walk out of their lives? Am I not worth the fight? Am I not worth the headache? How dare you let a phenomenal woman like myself escape your grasp.

I’m so attracted to men that don’t give a shit about me that it’s become a never ending circle of having someone treat me like shit every day of my life, the good men never last. I over analyze every relationship I have, "is he cheating?" "does he actually care about me?" etc. I’m the worst for that, I can’t seem to accept a good man when I have one.

I can’t be in a relationship because I can’t make somebody else my priority, I have a number one in my life. I could never see myself making an effort to put somebody on a pedestal close to the one I have the seed on. Would my companion find her as competition? As someone they need to beat when it comes to my love, affection, and time? I could never choose someone over her, are there men out there that are perfectly okay with KNOWING that they will never be number one?

Look like Jared Leto and we can make another baby.

Look like Jared Leto and we can make another baby.